I like the "She Art" by Christy Tomlinson, and I saw that there is a new class she'll be starting soon. I would love to take one of her classes, but I need to learn some more art education before I take that plunge.
For this post, the reason I mention her is this:
I have "abandonment issues," and I see many family members and friends all struggling as well. I think tons of people have the same challenge, but we all seem to be dealing with it on our own instead of sharing our emotions and fears with each other. I think it's almost like abandonment is the foundation of our lives. I can feel the rumbling even now, just the very idea of leaving THIS me and creating a new one who makes better choices.
So I've come to think of "abandonment" as a big bad scary creature living in between the cracks of life and doing its best to make the cracks deeper and more painful at all opportunities. Like this:
As I looked at the NAME of the new class, I realized something. It's called "The Art of Wild Abandonment" and I first thought it was a class to express your emotions into art or facing the stuff in your past to make art now. But then I realized something: there's more than one way to define that scary "A" word.
"Abandon" does mean "to leave completely and finally; forsake utterly; desert: to give up; discontinue; withdraw from" etc. And everyone has faced these feelings at one point or another. You, me, the fencepost, everyone.
it also means: To yield (oneself) without restraint or moderation; give (oneself) over to natural impulses, usually without self control.and THAT's when I figured out what the class is about. It's about letting your inner critic take a nap so you can create without fear. It's about being a kid again; it's about leaving your problems at the door and taking a ride on the roller coaster of LIFE. It's interesting how the same word has sort-of opposite meanings.
So I guess that's the road I'm on now. And I’m opening my heart and soul so that when I get to where I’m going, I’ll be able to fully immerse myself in what I have to learn.
Random back-story: Another one of my favorite words is "temper." I first became aware of it when my brother was living above a couple who were tattoo artists and they had named their son "Temper" and I loved it for a name. It has several meanings that are opposite as well:
I'm beginning to see a pattern here....... I'm sensing something coming, and it apparently has multiple, maybe even opposite meanings.